The first rule about Fight Club is that you don't blog about Fight Club

Kiwi: Fruit? or weird looking Bird?

is this a kiwi?

or is it this weird-ass looking thing?

Arguing for the Fruit will be: Bri
And in the Bird's corner: Jeff

DING DING!

Bird:
Clearly, a kiwi is that animal above that looks more like a round, fuzzy edible than a bird of any sort. And despite that self defeating logic to start off my argument, let’s review the facts. Being that both of these entities supposedly hail from New Zealand, I took a random survey of 3 NZ natives and asked them to draw a kiwi. I gave them no further guidance, and this is what they came up with:

The first man I came across actually was from Australia, but that’s close enough because, what he came up with clearly looks like that bird-thing pictured at the top of the page. Score one for the Bird!

The second person I came across was a lady of about 75, and she came up with this lovely image. While those could conceivably be the fruit, they look more like a couple of hairy meatballs, or genitalia besides. Sick New Zealanders. The lady wasn’t even nice enough to point me in the direction of the nearest Outback Steakhouse before hopping away from me like a kangaroo. She also gave me her number. How lovely. Score another for Kiwi the Bird.

Finally, I came across a stumbling drunk who scribbled this on the page. While it doesn’t resemble a bird in the slightest, It doesn’t look like any fruit I’ve seen! Also, I was directly afterward invited to a party by this man, and at the party, what did I find as the household pet but- you guessed it- A LITTLE BIRD THEY CALLED A KIWI! Inebriated man’s scribble for the sweep! BEAT THAT BRI!

Fruit:

Bri decided she wasn't going to bore you with those pesky things you might know as words, and instead chose to let her venn diagram do the talking. So here you go: 

Man, that sure is some fine artwork. The ball fuzz on the half-testicle in the middle is immaculately rendered. What this proves, I'm not sure, but we apparently now can conclude that a green testicle plus a weird bird looking thing equals half of a furry brown testicle with green insides.

So who wins? You tell us, internet.